#especially since i write so many chars who are so isolated in their canons... its so fun writing with ocs and just makes sense for them

[doomdays]

every time i write a reply for an oc i get a new lil burst of energy. i am changed, i am free, i am a new person

[chocochar]

Scorching Gaze [Dabi x Reader]

Chapter 1 First Memories

Author’s note: Hey, I finally decided to try getting back into writing reader inserts!! It’s been a few years, so I’m rusty and I’m taking kind of a leap with this given the theory hasn’t been confirmed but hey, why not? This won’t completely follow canon, like not much, so things will occur in this that don’t obviously happen in the manga/anime and vice versa, but this is fanfiction so let’s just have fun! :D Now enough of my talking, let’s hop right in!

~~~

[(F/n)’s POV]

I remember the day I first met them, met him.

I was about 8, and my family had just moved into our apartment in Musutafu while my dad was pursuing his role as a pro hero; he had wanted to live in the bigger city instead of the smaller hometown we came from in hopes of getting more jobs and catching more crime. It was a nice place, I guess, 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, the main room and a kitchen area. I missed the friends I did have back home, when your quirkless it’s hard to make more, especially in a city that’s home to one of the, if not the, best schools for up and coming heroes. Despite this though I kept a bright outlook and a smile on my face, just like my dad and the other pro heroes I looked up to.

I had finished all the unpacking I had to do that day, which mainly consisted of my room and part of the bathroom. Given we’d been unpacking for a few days by that point everything was pretty much done and when I came out of my room it was only about 1:30 PM. I found my mom finishing up the kitchen area and when she noticed me she smiled and asked,”All done, (F/n)?”

I gave a nod, her smile growing as she dusted her hands off and approached me, continuing,”Great! Mom’s all done too. I was about to head out to do some shopping since we’re basically out of food not including rice, and I don’t know about you but I am soooo done with rice!” I smiled, knowing she was just being dramatic to get a giggle out of me. I think she noticed I was a bit down with the move despite trying to hide it, and my wonders were confirmed when she added,”C’mon, why don’t us girls head out and get some ice cream too?” Of course my little ears perked at that! With her purse slung over her shoulder we headed out.

Shopping went alright, and after dropping everything off at home first mom and I went for the cold treat she promised; my eager, little 8 year old self was excited to go, I’d heard of this place from my friend Niri before and always wanted to go! It resided in a part of Musutafu housing the bigger and richer families, where big name pros lived. The place was small, surprising given the neighborhood it was in, but it was busy, and when mom and I finally got ours a lot of their flavors were out, but they at least had (favorite ice cream flavor) so I was content as was my mom. Given how busy it was we decided to go somewhere else to eat our sweets and noted a park not too far from the shop. I nearly dropped my cone a few times, with mom telling me to be careful, and reaching the park I felt a smile light up my face. Children ran around all over, parents sitting on benches or joining their little ones on the large playground, and so many kids showing off their new powers to others who stood in awe. While the sight made me excited I remembered feeling a bit left out. I was the only kid who couldn’t show anything. My mom seemed to notice immediately how my eyes followed each one, from a kid who could make turn his hands into any shape he pleased or a girl whose hair was strong enough to lift another child in the air, so tapping my back she gestured me to go make friends while she headed over to a bench.

I felt isolated, but I shook my head and took a breath, preparing myself. ‘I’m going to my friends! I’m going to make friends!’ I had this thought bouncing in my mind and ignored the negativity lingering, smiling brightly and skipping ahead. The sun bounced off my (hair color) locks and my (eye color) eyes sparkled with a newfound purpose: make a friend today! Even if it’s just one there’s always tomorrow!

Everything went fine at first, until every one found out about my ‘handicap’. Some asked questions, one threatened me, and some pitied. As a kid I was only a little used to this, but with each one that walked away distracted by yet another quirk my confidence started to fade and I prompted to just sit by my mom at the bench. Ice cream in hand I began to head for mom, licking the cold treat absentmindedly. I never understood why I was different, and I tried to push it back how I felt; maybe because I just didn’t understand or worry about it, or maybe to keep my parents from worrying about it.

I looked up from the ground when I heard another voice by my mom to see a young woman talking to her. Her hair was snow white, about shoulder length, and her eyes while grey were pretty. Her pale skin was fair and I tilted my head curiously wondering who this was. I’m pretty sure my mom initiated the conversation, as she seems to be leading it, but the lady seemed nice and they appeared to be getting along. I almost didn’t want to interrupt, and decided to eat my ice cream elsewhere. I stopped when two kids ran up to her, noting their hair was also white with the girl having little red streaks throughout I chalked it up to her being their mother; the older looked maybe a little younger than me, her short hair framing her petite face, and the younger only looked to be at most 3, his white hair on the spikier side. Tears pricked their eyes, which matched their mother’s, and while the sister explained in a panic,”Mo-Mom, Touya--- He’s---!” while pointing towards where they ran from my (eye color) orbs trailed to where she was pointing to. I couldn’t fully hear what she was saying but I was taken aback.

All I saw were blue flames and another child with red, messy hair crying as the flames rose up his arms and sprouted from his right cheek. Bandages covered his lower arms and a white patch rested on his cheek, but still the flames persisted. I couldn’t fully tell what was going on, except that a few older kids was backing away from him, the same fire partially surrounded him like a wall with a few openings, and he looked upset, but I also took note of how the flames left odd marks along where they came from. I’d only ever seen burns when my mom accidentally burned her hand while cooking one time, and given these looks similar my little brain chalked it up to being just that. ‘His flames hurt him?’ I thought, while also wondering if they came out because he got so upset. The bandages around his arms added to my suspicions, and I… I felt sorry. I didn’t even know this boy but he seemed to be in pain as he touched his arms and couldn’t seem to stop the bright flames.

While I didn’t know what to do and my brain raced my body seemed to move on its own as I approached the boy; the kids who I’m guessing surrounded him minutes before backed off and ran, parents seeming concerned and telling their kids to come over. To be honest I was scared like them and I even had my mom calling me to come over while the woman she was speaking to stood up and looked shocked at the boy, but I just glanced at them before continuing. I passed the flames, my heart thundered while my quirkless body trembled and I stopped only a couple feet from him. I was terrified, what if this boy kills me? What if I wind up charred in the hospital?? What if he explodes or something?! Shaking my head I took a breath and dispelled the thoughts. ‘No, I don’t think any of that will happen! He just seems sad… Maybe…’

I raised my hand and with a,”Hello.~” I held out the ice cream to him. (Luckily it wasn’t hot that day, the ice cream stayed mostly unmelted but I made sure to wrap the cone in a napkin just in case!)

You could practically feel the tenseness in the air but I kept my smile up and waited for a response. When he finally opened his eyes and looked up at me my expression went from friendly to surprised as my (eye color) orbs met those of a bright, striking blue. They contrasted beautifully with his fiery hair, his height being only an inch or two taller than me, and his face… Without realizing it pink dusted my little cheeks and I shook my head coming back to reality. My smile returned and I slowly held out my other hand for him to take. “Here, can I see your hand?” I asked. He seemed on guard so I stayed patient and showing a warm grin I asked,”Please?” He still seemed cautious but I watched as he did as asked slowly and carefully. When he did this the flames on that arm seemed to disperse almost like he was calming down and turning his hand over I placed the ice cream in his palm. I used the hand holding the ice cream to close his fingers over the cone and meeting his eyes again I let his hands go.

He seemed confused as he glanced at the treat before looking at me again, I was pretty sure he was wondering why I did that, but I just said,”It’s for you! My mom always gets me sweets when I’m upset and I could see you were mad. Taste it!”

Still he seemed confused, but to my joy he nodded and licked it; I watched as his face lit up and the flames died down until they disappeared. He no longer looked in pain and he continued to taste the ice cream while I eagerly say,”You look much better now!”

He stops and looks up again surprised this time, but straightening he replies,”... Thank you.” His face seems to turn pink in embarrassment and I giggle, unable to not think about how adorable his face looks right now. Which quickly makes me blush again and look away. I hear steps coming hurriedly and look back watching the woman and her kids coming over with my mom who immediately jumps into a lecture about how I need to stop going head first into dangerous or possibly dangerous situations. I only partially listened as I was distracted watching the mom fret over the boy, the older sister hugging him while crying and the younger brother mimicking her. He nodded as the woman, who I guessed was his mom too, talked to him and when she finished he looked over and once more our eyes met.

“(Mom’s name) I am so sorry,” the other mother apologized, pushing some of her bangs back while her face appeared distraught. “He’s not used to his quirk yet, he got mad and…”

“Rei, it’s okay! (F/n) should’ve let you handle things but hey, she helped him out of it so everything is okay now! See, little guy is all happy now huh?” My mom grinned at him, and while he smiled back he seemed bothered, looking at the ice cream again before me.

“Did you want this back?” He asked, but I shook my head.

“No, it’s okay, I gave it to you,” I replied, plus he licked it already, I did before him but I figured I’ll just let him have it since he doesn’t seem bothered by that.

“Anyways, now that that’s all settled, Rei, this is my daughter, (F/n),” my mom introduced me. Peering up at the other woman she smiled and I bowed.

“It’s nice to meet you, (F/n), you look a lot like your mother,” she chuckled, and I shook my head denying it. Everyone said that but I didn’t think so!

“(F/n), this is Rei Todoroki, we went to school together, crazy running into her huh?”

I tilted my head and shrugged. “Yeah, although you like to talk to everyone.” This gained me a look of playful annoyance from my mom but she ignored it and continued.

“And these are her kids, Touya,” she pointed to the redhead,”Fuyumi,” the next she pointed as the girl,”and little Natsuo.~” She pointed to the toddler last and my eyes glanced over every one, landing on Touya when my mom added,”Touya is only about a year older than you, and Fuyumi about a year younger. They don’t live too far from here so mom had an idea: What do you say about maybe playdates and stuff?”

Playdates?? This piqued my attention immediately as my goal for the day suddenly popped up in my head and my eyes lit up. I nodded nearly wasting no time in doing so and she held up a thumbs up at Rei, who softly smiled. My eyes returned to the other 3 children, all 3 looking back and stepping up to them I held out my hands to shake theirs.

“It’s nice to meet you guys.~”

~~~

“--/n).... (F/n)!!”

With a gasp my eyes opened wide and in surprise I fell out of my bed hitting the carpeted floor below with a thud. Groaning I don’t move at first, which changes when someone taps my back with their foot. Slowly I look back, rubbing my head wondering who the hell is in my apartment, to find it’s Kanishi, my partner at work and also a friend from high school. His black hair is spiked as always, the dark circles under his eyes ever present, but his suit looks nice like it does every day.

“What the… How did you get into my apartment?” I ask while yawning. I stand up and head for my bathroom to start my morning routine.

“You gave me a key, remember? Why aren’t you awake already?” He asks, crossing his arms while a stern look plasters itself on his  face. If I caught as many crooks as I’ve seen that face I’d be detective of the year 3 years running.

“Cause my alarm hasn’t gone off yet, aren’t you here too early?”

“Do you know what time it is?” He asks, the look hardening. I freeze, toothbrush in my mouth and shake my head. With a sigh he pulls his phone out and shows me the time. I nearly choke on my toothbrush and finishing up immediately I push him out of my room before slamming the door and rushing around looking for clothes.

‘Dammit!! Why didn’t I hear my alarm?!’ I think, throwing on simple clothes for the day. I rush around brushing my (short, long, etc) (hail color) hair and not worrying about makeup before I grab my phone, keys, badge, and bag.

“5 minutes, new record,” Kanishi comments, which just gains a glare from me as I run out of my room and pull him along. We leave my apartment in a rush, hurrying out to his car and groaning as I sit in the passenger side rubbing my temples. I’ve never been late, why is today so different?! A detective is supposed to be punctual!... At least how I see it. Although if it wasn’t for Kanishi I would’ve been late at least 3 times by now. Becoming a detective I try to make it my job to also be on time just in case, especially with the crime rate really picking up in the last couple months. With this ‘League of Villains’ stuff going on villains have gotten more daring, and wound up in jail just the same. Rubbing my neck and slumping in the seat, my eyes feel heavy as I feel like I forgot something important at home… “You seem kinda absentminded, you okay?” my partner asks, to which I nod but am too lost in my thoughts to respond.

He’s not wrong, my brain has been elsewhere the last few weeks. “I don’t know why, but… I keep having this dream of when I met some childhood friends of mine, specifically… One friend.”

“Is it the one about the Todoroki’s or something?”

I nod, my brows furrowing.

It goes quiet as I can’t seem to think about anything other than why I’m having it so frequently. After all there’s no reason right? Everything happened years ago, with… Him. I still keep in touch with Fuyumi, Natsuo, and I even met Shouto. So why-

“Maybe it’s a sign or something.”

I freeze and slowly look at him with a confused expression. “... huh?”

“It makes sense, right? Who has the same dream or dreams like it every night or every time they sleep if the dreams aren’t trying to say something?”

I’m silent but my expression shows I think he’s lost it, as he tries to validate his point. But smiling I listen to him ramble on while again getting lost in thought. A sign huh?

.... No way.

[psy-kylo-gy]

Dear Antis & Pablo Hidalgo: We're not stupid. We KNOW Kylo is the villain.

No one is saying (or should be saying) he’s not a villain. If they are saying that, they’re analyzing the information incorrectly. TFA makes his villainy ABUNDANTLY clear. They don’t sugarcoat anything, we are told outright that he destroyed his Parents’ and Uncle’s lives, they don’t brush Lor San Tekka or Han under the rug, they don’t downplay his torturing Poe or Rey or hurting Finn. JJ flat out calls him a coward, which he is. Kylo Ren is a persona, someone who WANTS to be like Vader and who WANTS to deny the light exists. He thinks Ben Solo was weak and foolish. This inner conflict is one of his key defining characteristics, the other is that he is NOT HAPPY with this path he chose–this path he supposedly wants so badly–whether he admits it or not.

Since Pablo likes to apparently mock men who show emotion or people who deal poorly with their “manpain” (which is another way of saying “LOL, this guy could be coded as mentally ill but really he’s just a pathetic pussy and a crappy whiny entitled anti-hero that I can’t stand and I want everyone to know that his parents were PERFECT and Snoke manipulating him was a JOKE we threw in at the last minute because Leia is just a hopeful mom who doesn’t really know anything about her own child–Ben Solo was BORN BAD and you should all hate him cuz I sure do, LULZ!”) Pablo is, to me, just another useless unhelpful derogatory petty black-and-white only! asshole fanboy I can’t ever take seriously. And if he wrote these movies and wrote Kylo like he apparently wanted then I know many people besides myself who would have been *sorely* disappointed. This writing team wrote three heroes AND A VILLAIN that I’m invested in now. Suck a dick, Pablo.

Since Kylo is NOT written like other Star Wars villains I can’t really bring myself to have a set standard of expectations for him as I do other Star Wars villains–which includes:

• death by the hero’s hands, or • redemption by death

Perhaps another option is available now because Kylo makes me **gasp** question a lot of things, especially when it concerns Rey and their “interesting relationship going forward”!!! So, my dear Antis & Pablo, I guess I should apologize for… what exactly? For being interested in this unique villain’s fate? How his role as a villain might change later based on the multitude of conflict in his character? For the canon compassion he has strangely shown to a prisoner of war? For looking deeper into things–for speculating beyond what few details we are explicitly told? No, I can’t (and won’t) just overlook that Kylo has done horrible things but I also can’t (and won’t) overlook that he is ALSO written in the script, the film, and both novels (and blatantly I might add) as a character with Byronic traits and sympathetic qualities:

• He has a “Bottomless well of pain” • He has been taught by Snoke to think that Vader only “failed” because of sentiment. Vader *choosing* to return to the light was not discussed, rather it was Luke’s sole desire to “tempt” his father into death from compassion • He is pleased when his own people fear him, which feeds into his obsession with Darth Vader, who he wants so badly to emulate because he fears that he himself will never be strong enough • Is told “you are my favorite, you are so special” by his father figure only to be told the next minute “I don’t think you’re strong enough to do this one thing I need you to do though.” I mean… they can’t make it any clearer. That is textbook abuser/groomer lingo. • Is shown to be very passionate and emotional (of all shades) and openly forthcoming with those emotions. Still very capable of attachment though he stubbornly denies it. • So isolated that the only support system he has to console him in any time of need is the charred mask of his dead grandfather • A man who has “shirked the sun” • “A student who took no joy in his studies. One who perceived only the great problems of the galaxy and not its simple pleasures.” • “His mind was a turbulent ocean of fear” • Han did not understand nor have faith in his son, in his eyes Ben “was always drawn to the dark side… he had too much Vader in him” and Han “would’ve given anything for his son to be ordinary–like him.” Daddy issues are very much a thing for Kylo Ren • Is directly berated by Snoke for being weak (“You have compassion for her.”) • “Starved himself of nourishment” • “His eyes were dim and dark and terribly sad.” • At the mere mention of Leia both by Snoke and by Han, Kylo Ren shows intense emotion. There is still a strong link there. • “In his last few seconds of life Han saw only his son. The darkness in his eyes. And the sadness. Han forgave his son for what he had done and prayed that his son could forgive him in return.”

With defining characteristics like that, Kylo’s character has choices in his story arc if only for the simple fact *because* he is written as multi-dimensional and occasionally sympathetic. This all points to what I said before–Kylo Ren is unlike the usual Star Wars villain… he is actually suffering intensely for his craft and letting himself be Snoke’s puppet because he has so little self worth besides his Force abilities. He doesn’t know anything else. I went into TFA fully expecting to hate Kylo with my entire soul but, like Han, I saw sadness there and a huge absence of joy in being the villain. Now, I personally enjoy Kylo’s villainy, I love his Skywalker sass and his melodrama, I love that he can be completely calm or completely unhinged, I love that he’s not completely consumed by the dark yet but he WANTS to be so badly, I love that the light in him refuses to go away, and I love that he’s not pure evil incarnate for the sake of evil such as Tarkin, Palpatine, Vader, Boba Fett, Jabba, etc. He is a *really* interesting villain and I don’t understand why Pablo despises him so much except that he resents the fact that so many fans have taken to Kylo Ren. Maybe don’t make such a relatable human villain next time, kay?

I also want to add that I don’t think Kylo was brainwashed at all. I don’t get that vibe. Kylo isn’t stupid by any means… but he has definitely been coaxed from a very young age by a predator to think in a way he wouldn’t normally think. Pablo is so confusing because he doesn’t always correlate to what the film and the novels tell us. He makes it sound like he was “born bad” but that’s not what the story is saying to me at all. A powerful Force-sensitive being took advantage of this child’s innocence and twisted it into fear, obedience, and insecurity. I’m not sorry for having sympathy for Kylo, at least for that much. Pablo also says that Kylo blames everyone else? I’m sure he blames his parents for not being there and blames Luke for something as well. But as far as we can see he *wanted* to be with Snoke and wouldn’t blame his fall–something he wanted–on anyone else. He doesn’t blame Snoke for a DAMN THING and even defends him to Han.

What happens to Kylo from now on lingers on Kylo NOT being the coward anymore. He is so powerful but so afraid, and so alone. The dark doesn’t have to be his destiny, and I hope it isn’t. Some people can’t seem to accept that we’re not excusing actions or making him blameless. We’re saying he can change, the way he has been written thus far supports that. Also… this is Star Wars. Darth Vader became a freaking light side Force ghost after killing perhaps millions of innocent people. I’m not saying Kylo will get a redemption, I’m not saying he *deserves* a redemption, I’m saying he is the type of character who could make a redemption arc work in a really powerful way. You don’t know what’s going to happen… don’t knock us for something you don’t know about either.

I expect him to be very villainous in Episode VIII… but as a character I also expect growth because he is a focus of this trilogy just like Finn and Rey. Killing Han weakened him, being defeated (and turned down) by Rey appalled him, he’s going to have to prove himself even more to Snoke now because he did a huge chain of fuck-ups during TFA, including the huge one that Snoke blatantly warned him about: that nasty ol’ compassion. I’m really excited for Episode VIII and I won’t let antis or Pablo bring me down. I’m giving Rian Johnson my full attention.